THE WTF GLOBAL TIMES

🗞️ THE WTF GLOBAL TIMES 50% News. 50% Satire. 100% Mayhem. News: 50% | Satire: 50% | Transliteration Confusion: 100% Jesus was Yeshua. Mary was Miriam. Simon became Kephas, then Petros, then Peter. Matthew was Mattityahu. John was Yochanan. And somewhere between Aramaic, Greek, Latin, English, church tradition, empire, translation, and Sunday school, everyone got a passport name change without visiting the embassy. By: Professor Alphabet Acharya, Senior Correspondent for Biblical Name Migration, Lost Vowels & Apostolic Identity Confusion With historical chaos by: Dr. Transliteration Subramaniam, Department of Hebrew Roots, Greek Endings & Latin Makeovers Edited by: Sister Miriam-Mary Devi, Chairperson, Bureau of Sacred Names & Suspiciously European Spellings 👁️‍🗨️ This Blog uses WTF strictly in the context of: Weird, True & Freaky. Not as profanity. Unless the Ayatollahs start tweeting Greek declensions, Roman scribes start renaming everyone in Latin, or a Sunday-sch...

🗞️ THE WTF GLOBAL TIMES 50% News. 50% Satire. 100% Mayhem. News: 50% | Satire: 50% | Desert Survival Doubts: 100% Was Jesus fasting, praying, hallucinating, spiritually training, symbolically reenacting Moses, or simply starring in the Bible’s most famous wilderness episode with no camera crew, no witness list, and absolutely no food-delivery app? By: Dr. Fastus Maximus, Senior Correspondent for Biblical Hunger, Desert Drama & Spiritual Meal-Skipping With analysis by: Professor Wilderness Subramaniam, Department of Theology, Temptation & Emergency Hydration Edited by: Sister Snackless Devi, Chairperson, Bureau of Miracles, Metaphors & Missing Breakfasts 👁️‍🗨️ This Blog uses WTF strictly in the context of: Weird, True & Freaky. Not as profanity. Unless the Ayatollahs start tweeting Lent recipes, the devil opens a bakery in the Judean desert, or scholars begin carbon-dating Jesus’ lunchbox. Then even the footnotes may need holy water. Let us begin with the question tha...